Pregnancy, Delivery, and Baby

Christina and I went into the hospital January 8th at 2 a.m. She was having contractions about 5-10 minutes apart, and she was 2 cm dilated. The baby was 2 cm behind the pelvic bone, so she had a little ways to go.

After 20 minutes on the monitor, she got the go ahead to walk around for a while (Christina, not the baby). By 4:30 a.m., she had dilated to 3 cm, was put back on the monitor, and got an epidural (yeah, drugs!), and we got an hour of sleep.

By 9 a.m., she had dilated to about 4-5 cm, and the amniotic sac was squeezing out a little and is getting ready to burst. Then the serious labor was to begin.

Everyone was doing well. We were very excited. Little Erin wasn't due until January 12-13, so it was a nice surprise for us to have it happen early.

By noon, Christina's cervix was dilated to 7 cm but had not progressed for several hours. The doctor allowed us to sit tight and wait it out because the baby's heartbeat and motion were looking great; Erin didn't appear to be in any distress. However, around 3 p.m., Christina developed a low fever, so the decision was made to go ahead and perform a cesarean section.

Christina was whisked off to prepare her for the surgery, while I packed up all the stuff and moved it into the recovery room. I got all dressed up in scrubs and was taken to the operating room where Christina was all hooked up and ready to go. I was relieved to be there to support Christina, and I was disappointed to find out that I wouldn't be able to watch the surgery (they put up a screen). I was really curious to see what would happen, but we could mostly only guess what was going on based on Christina's sensation of pressure and movement (the anesthetic took care of the pain).

Eventually, the screen was lowered just as Erin was being pulled out of her mother (with considerable force). It was 4:14 p.m. The umbilical cord was clipped, and Erin was taken to a warming table where a team from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) was standing by to evaluate her condition and help get her started in the world. Christina and I were very concerned when we didn't hear the heartfelt and robust crying that we were expecting. Instead, we heard a small cry, a kind of whimper. We could hear baby noises, but they weren't what we were expecting.

After a couple minutes, I was allowed to walk over to the warming table and take a look at our new girl. Christina was strapped to the table, though, so she would have to wait a while to see her daughter again. I found out that Erin wasn't breathing as well as they would like, and that her color wasn't bright and pink; her extremities were rather purplish in tone. So, after a few pictures (which didn't end up turning out well), and a stamp of her feet on my arms (my first tattoo?), Erin was briefly presented to Christina then taken away in an incubator to the NICU.

I returned to Christina's side as the doctors finished putting her back together and stapling her shut.

We then wheeled into the recovery room for a little while, where we were joined by Joan, Christina's mom and a brand-new grandma. She had been there for most of the day on Saturday. Joan and I were allowed to go see Erin in the NICU (very exciting for both of us). Christina was taken with all our stuff to the mother and baby unit. Over the next several hours, I got to see Erin a few more times, and I even got to give her her first feeding, which consisted of a small amount of breast milk from Christina (pumped just a short time before), and a little bit of formula. It felt great to have her in my arms and looking into my eyes. I felt a real connection with her that I have been longing for for a long time.

Erin had been given an X-ray upon arrival at the NICU, which showed fluid in her lungs. Apparently, this isn't uncommon in babies delivered via c-section. In a regular birth, the liquid is forced out by having to squeeze through a 10 cm hole. So, Erin would need some time to reabsorb the liquid in her lungs. In the mean time, she wasn't needing to be on a respirator, they just wanted to keep an eye on her, and monitor her progress. So, electrodes were attached to several places on her body (which can be seen in a couple pictures) to measure her breathing, pulse, blood pressure, and blood oxygen. It was neat to see how she was doing in an instant, but the cords made it difficult to maneuver her for feedings (especially for new parents like us).

Compared to other baby's in the NICU, she was big and healthy and happy-looking. It was a relief to see her doing so well, and a little frustrating to not have her with us in the room, as we had been expecting.

We didn't know when Christina would be allowed to go see Erin, or when Erin would be allowed to join us in the mother and baby unit (where most newborns were taken directly from delivery). We finally wheeled Christina (along with her IV) down to the NICU just before midnight on Saturday. After that, we saw her every 3-4 hours for her feedings. Christina and I got as much sleep as we could in the time between feedings (something we'll be familiar with soon, I'm sure).

Finally, at lunchtime on Sunday, after a few more feedings, Erin was brought up to the nursery from the NICU. Yeah! It was such a relief to have her in the room, and nursing without any cords and without being surrounded by NICU staff, beeping monitors, and the general hubbub of the NICU. It made a huge difference for momma and baby.

Honeymoon

Okay, we really will get around to putting the full story here I know it's been a long, long time. It will happen. Really.

How We Met (Michael's Version)

In July of 2003, American Mensa held its Annual Gathering (AG) in St. Paul, MN. The first evening of the gathering, several of us from the Chicago area sat together in the Sexyg Fishbowl (see explanation below). One of the questions that came up was "What was the most unusual place that you've made out?" A woman across the room answered "In a tree," then went on to explain how she had climbed up into a tree with a boyfriend of hers and they had made out while people walked on the sidewalk, oblivious to what was going on above them. Everyone in the room was impressed (it was a tough act to follow), and it really caught my attention. I had no idea who the attractive woman was, however.

	Sexyg Fishbowl Explained In Mensa, when a bunch of folks get together around a particular activity, they call it a special interest group (SIG). So, the people interested in sex (who isn't?) call themselves the sex-sig, hence Sexyg. The fishbowl is a common part of regional or annual gatherings in which people ask each other questions about sex in an open, safe setting. Participants write questions (for men or women) onto slips of paper. The chairs are arranged in two concentric circles. The women sit facing the center in the inner circle. The men sit (also facing the center) in the outer circle of chairs. The moderators then read each question aloud, and the women can volunteer responses about their own experiences. The responses should not be third-party stories, but should be the person's own feelings or experiences. The men are not allowed to talk during this phase of the fishbowl. However, halfway through the session, after a short break, the men and women change places, and the men answer questions read by the moderators. Thus, the men are "in the fishbowl" in the second half. The sessions are not anonymous, but people are expected to not attribute something that was said to a particular person, so it's somewhat confidential...

So, when a group of people got together for dinner the next night, I was shocked to find out that she was from the Chicago area. In the restaurant, I sat next to Steve Levinthal, a friend of mine. He and I flirted with Christina throughout dinner, and I'm sure I was acting like a little puppy-dog. (It has been pointed out to me by more than one person that my feelings were very obvious.)

For the rest of the weekend, we hung out from time to time, along with the other folks from Chicago. But nothing really happened.

Steve was kind enough to give me her cell phone number a couple weeks later, and I gave her a call that night. I asked her out for that weekend, but she said she was going to be out of town on business. Instead, she suggested that we get together the following night. This got my attention, and we started forming a plan. When she mentioned that she had a hair appointment that she might need to reschedule, I told her that I could use a hair cut, and how would she feel if I arranged for the two of us to get our hair cut the same time? She sounded surprised, but amused, and agreed.

The next night, I drove to Oak Park, and met her at the salon. It was fascinating to be seated next to one another, but not really be in a position to talk to one another. Facing the mirrors, it was much more convenient to talk to the stylists. So, we only exchanged a few words before we headed out to the Thai restaurant down the street.

This is where the story gets particularly interesting.

After dinner, we went to an ice cream parlor for dessert. We got to talking about the things we like to do, and she mentioned that she was going to be the chair person for one of the largest canoeing clubs in the Midwest. My jaw dropped open and my eyebrows shot up. I was amazed that she not only enjoyed canoeing and camping, but was leading an organization devoted to the activity. I told her that I was planning a trip to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness in a couple months, and asked if she'd be interested in coming along. She agreed with hardly any hesitation.

In many ways, it was downhill from there. The Boundary Waters trip is another story....

How We Got Engaged

Michael had been on kayak trips to Door County and the Apostle Islands with Chris Edwards and Susan Wilson, and they had talked about making a canoe trip to the Boundary Waters, one of the most beautiful wilderness areas in the country. When Michael and Christina started dating in July, the planning took on a slightly different character, since it wouldn't just be several friends going, but would probably be two couples. This simplified the camping and paddling arrangement, though (two people per tent and canoe).

Michael had been to all of the places that were on the plan over fifteen years ago. He couldn't remember every lake, but he had fond memories of a particular island on which he had camped. So, when they were planning this year's trip, they included a day off from paddling on this island.

The day off (aka "duff day") was very relaxing. It saved a lot of time not having to break down camp and set it up at the end of the day. That time was spent swimming, exploring, and, um, some other activities (ask one of them to tell the "low-flying airplane" story).

So, they were all feeling very mellow after dinner, and Michael headed off into the woods toward the latrine. When he hadn't returned after a while, Christina assumed he was just off exploring with his GPS. Besides, it wasn't that big of an island. When he returned, though, he was quite excited, and told Christina that he found something that he wanted her to see.

He had marked the location as a waypoint in the GPS receiver, and initially let Christina wander through the trees toward the spot, but realized that it would be easier to stay to an indistinct trail around the perimeter of the island.

When they had rounded the corner of the island and climbed a short rise, Christina spotted lights in the distance. What could it be? Landing strip? Indians? Aliens? None of these made sense, and she stopped for a moment to ponder the question. Michael was quite eager for her to get there, though, and encouraged her to keep going (okay, pushed her).

Each step brought them closer to the lights, but not any closer to figuring out what they could be. It wasn't until they were standing right above them that Christina could see that they were candles on a wide, flat rock on the edge of the water. Even then, she couldn't figure out what candles were doing out in the wilderness (cult ritual?).

Michael helped her down, and solved the mystery by going down on one knee and asking her to marry him. She was so surprised, it took her a moment to respond (one of the longest moments in Michael's life). Then, they lay down on the rock surrounded by the candles and enjoyed the moment; northern lights overhead, water gently lapping on the rocks, the whisper of the gentle breeze through the nearby pines, and warmth of their embrace.

They eventually returned to camp and announced the good news to Chris and Susan. Then all four of them returned to the site of the proposal, and took a picture to commemorate the occasion (see photo). To top it all off, Chris got out the satellite phone that they had brought with them, and they called friends and family to announce the engagement.